1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
gothdabi
foulserpent

i want to be a conventionally attractive wealthy skinny ciswoman so i can go on the bachelor and make it all the way thru the competition, and when the guy proposes to me i just like leap towards him and close my teeth around his neck and bite as hard as i can. just absolute animal brutality like shaking his neck like a ragdoll, growling ripping tearing etc, and then before anyone can stop me immediately run into traffic and die so no one ever gets the chance to understand why that happened

sharkpunks

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rottenczar

Anonymous asked:

Fran drescher opposes vaccine mandates just fyi

goldcrescent

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ralfmaximus

I guarantee you the studios are going through every outspoken actor's files looking for something, anything to discredit them. Ron Perlman is probably undergoing the deepest background check of his life right now, thanks to Bob Iger.

So brace yourself to hear some unsavory shit about your favorite actors in the next few weeks. Some of it might even be true. But that doesn't change the righteousness of the cause or the truths they speak.

montymollusk
devilishdescent

you sit down at the plastic table because your partner likes being outside at the bar even though it’s 90 degrees and 60% humidity at 10pm and you thought this corduroy dress was soooo cute but now youre all sweaty and so one of your balls has escaped your panties but youre wearing fishnets so your loose nut is now dying like a sea turtle in a six pack ring and youre the desperate diver trying to save it but blind and one handed and stone faced cause you can’t draw attention to the fact that youre doing a high stakes wildlife rescue on your stupid scrotum in public because it might turn into a six month news cycle and desantis might fly out to personally bulldoze the bar. and its a thursday

devilishdescent

i dreamt this post got 19k notes overnight and everyone i knew had disowned me for for my cat 5 Sack Slip event